It’s week 3 of my slow read, deep dive of Amy Morin’s 13 Things Mentally Strong People Don’t Do. For those that know me, reading a book over 13 weeks, one chapter at a time, is difficult. I love to gather new information but I often don’t take the time to process it as I go. This has been a challenge and a blessing for me so far. This week has been more challenging than the other 2, hence the delay in my post.
This week the focus is on change and how mentally strong people don’t shy away from it. Change is scary. Change is fun. Change is hard. Changes are big and small, fast and slow. Change is part of life. I have worked in the cellular industry for most of my career and we live by the saying, “change is the only constant.” We face change all the time. Think for a minute about how you react when a change comes about. Are you excited? scared? prepared? annoyed? sad? All of these emotions are normal when a change is first requested of us or we begin to see the need for a change. It’s what happens next that sets you apart.
Amy opens the chapter up with a quote from James Gordon:
It’s not that some people have willpower and some don’t…
It’s that some people are ready to change and others are not.
Go back and read that quote again. I’ll wait……..
Just reading the first line of this chapter gave me so much freedom. Since it’s the first of the year and many resolutions about getting healthy have been made, there is lots of talk about willpower to eat right and exercise. I like to exercise and I like healthy foods but I always struggle with making the commitment to doing both. I felt this was a willpower issue. Looking deeper…maybe my mind hasn’t been ready to change my habits. I could stay here for a while but I’ll move ahead.
Amy goes on to discuss the 5 stages of change in the chapter. Thinking about change on a personal level, there are many of the stages that aren’t thought about or done out of order. When I think about it on a business level, there are stages that get skipped completely leading an organizational change to fail. The stages she discusses are:
- Pre-contemplation – need to change hasn’t been identified
- Contemplation – considering the benefits of change
- Preparation – start making plans to change
- Action – start working the plan to change
- Maintenance – continuing to work your plan
I know that for me personally step 2 and 5 are the hardest. I am one the likes to just jump into a change and don’t calculate all the things that could happen. Then once I have started to make changes, the maintenance is hard for me. Not following this plan is probably one of the main reasons I have struggled with personal change.
Change is important in life. You have to change to grow. Small changes or big changes, they have to happen. Here are some of the reasons Amy says we shouldn’t shy away from change that really jumped out at me to share.
- Staying the same often equals getting stuck in a rut.
- You won’t learn new things.
- Your life may not get better.
- The longer you wait, the harder it gets. (AMEN!! That is the truth.)
Thinking about the stories in this chapter (which are all inspiring), I know that I am not alone. And that means you aren’t along either! Change happens to everyone, whether it’s voluntary or mandatory. Having the mindset to work through change in the right ways will help us succeed. You have to be mentally ready for change and mentally strong people embrace change. I encourage you not to run from change but toward it. Work through the steps above, keep pushing everyday. We can do this.
Have a great week!
Heather
College & Career: Uncomplicated 